I wrote an instagram post about a week ago, that touched upon my relationship with the gym and I thought I would go into more detail and hopefully some of you have thought the same too.
I began going to the gym when I was around 17 at a gym in Stanley Green, called Fit4Less (can you tell that I only had a part time job at this point?). There are no elements of it that were particularly lavish, but it had all of the right equipment, clean and was the beginnings of me having the best body I have ever had without even realising – those were the days.
My bestie and I started going to the gym probably around ⅔ times a week, to me it was more for us to spend time together and see each other, rather than realising that my body was progressively getting better. Because of this, I didn’t develop a relationship with the gym that I have now where I realise how much I need to do it not just physically, but also mentally. When you work out, all of these amazing things happen to your body without you even realising and it is only when you stop working out that you realise all of the benefits.
About half way through last year, I decided to leave Fit4Less as I was moving and wouldn’t fit it as easy to get to and I had also fallen out of love with working out; maybe it was due to the gym not being what I wanted or that I was running away (no pun intended) from having to keep my body fit and had let laziness take ahold of me.
Immediately after I quit, I kept saying to myself and those around me that I was planning on joining a different gym, one with better facilities or that was closer to me – I now realise that I was just making excuses and avoiding the inevitable of beginning to work out again. This carried on for the rest of the year, until my boyfriend persuaded me to try doing at home workouts as that is what he does. The harsh reality of that was realising that I am the kind of person that needs to be in the right surroundings to give me motivation to work out, more that I can’t be distracted by doing anything else.
I coasted for a while, consoling myself with the fact that I walk a lot of places and didn’t eat too horrendously but inevitably the weight started creeping up on me. Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t put on a considerable amount but just enough that I realised that it was time for me to do something about it and start working out again. It’s a strange reality when you realise that you’ve put on weight, because more often than not people eat for comfort and you can’t do that anymore and if you do you just feel an undeniable guilt. A new found laziness, that is part frustration and part ‘what’s the point?’ as you’re thinking the weight has already come on you.
In hindsight, I should have recognised that I did not have much to lose and that it would have been easier for me to start working on it as soon as possible, but life is not that kind and I decided to delay it further. It was only until I got invited to go for a day at Total Fitness with a friend who went there, and I was blown away. It had everything you could ever want in a gym: spacious, great equipment, swimming pool, jacuzzi, sauna. Due to all of these amazing facilities, it probably comes as no surprise that it cost £45 a month to go. When you go from paying £15 a month for the gym, to nothing, to then go up to £45 is quite a daunting thought.
In the end, I decided I needed to bite the bullet, and start to take control of my body and mental health. I have been at Total Fitness now for nearly a month, I have been ⅔ times a week and I am hoping to get it up to 3 or 4 times a week and keep up the progress I have made until I become the Nicole I want to be again.
It’s good to be back!
All my love,