Now we all know those quotes about ‘no bad vibes’ and as much as someone genuinely saying that to my face makes me want to vom a bit in my mouth – I think there is some truth to it. The etymology of the phrase originally came from an 1893 astrology textbook, but was made popular by the Beach Boys with their 1966 hit “Good Vibrations”. They considered calling the song ‘Good Vibes’ but thought the term might be too ‘trendy’, little did they know it was soon to become a popular lexicon used by guys and gals everywhere. Now, that you’ve had your History lesson, let me delve into the reason for my blog post today.
Someone giving off ‘bad vibes’ is a phrase that people no longer take seriously. Whether that’s because of overuse, being mass-quoted on every piece of wall art imaginable, or because the meaning of it has now been translated into more complex phrases. To me, it is about people who bring negativity into your life, which then translates to the now push of self-love and getting rid of toxic elements in your life. There is no list of things that are defined as being ‘toxic’ for everyone to follow, it is about listening to yourself and if you feel like something is off, then take a step back and think about why that may be. There is no shame in admitting that something isn’t good for you, and sometimes that’s the hardest part and it only gets easier from there.
What drove me to want to write this blog post, was that I have recognised certain elements of my life were toxic to me and already feel like I’m reaping the rewards of speaking my mind and putting myself first. For me, getting my house with my boyfriend has been an incredible thing – I didn’t realise how much it was affecting me not having my own space, and feel so thankful that I am now lucky enough to have a gorgeous little house that I can call my own. This may be a part of your life which you are nailing, and it is important, as I was seeing earlier, to have a think about what is making you feel unhappy and really narrow it down.
One of the shittest ones, and I think we can all relate, is realising that some friends are not good for you and it’s time to face the music and do something about it. It may not even be that you have had a huge issue with a friend, but you have both grown, changed and maybe the way they act doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, it’s all-important. And, it all matters. Then again, you could have had a huge blowup, and you may worry more about the dynamic of your life or your friendship group more than how that person made you feel – please try to recognise that how you feel is the most important, everything else comes second. Or, sometimes, 10,394,945,348,545th. Sometimes, it takes that final thing to happen for you to realise that you don’t want to surround yourself with people who don’t love you for who you are and help you want to be the best version of yourself.
It’s all about taking those little steps to make you feel like yourself again, and some of them will not be the easiest processes – there are a lot of demons that I still have, but I am in a place where I know that I want to focus on banishing those little shits – expecto patronum their ass.
I realise how lucky I am to have such an incredible network around me and recognise that some people aren’t that fortunate – so if any ever needs to chat then please please drop me a message because I am all ears x
All my love,