What’s it like being in a relationship since I was 17

Whenever someone asks me how long I’ve been with my boyfriend, they always seem really shocked when I say 4 years, as I am only the mere age of 21 right now.

At that time, the idea of having a boyfriend wasn’t the most important goal that I had – there were many other aspects that seemed much more worth my effort: finding my own style, realising I didn’t want to go to uni and trying not to lose the will to live with college. 

Growing up, we’re always told that in college, uni, basically being in your twenties that it is the time to act wild and fuck loads of guys and ‘discover’ yourself. Well, that was rather hard considering that I went to a sixth form in the little village I grew up in, with 50 other people that I had spent 5 years of high school with. Not exactly, the wild beginning of your life as you can imagine. 

So when I got this part-time job I was really nervous – not only had I never really known that many boys outside of the ones that I had grown up with, let alone attractive boys in their twenties. Jeez. A really strong factor that I probably should mention is that I had braces and not really found my ‘style’ yet so I wasn’t looking as 🔥🔥🔥 then as I am now (I know, it’s hard to imagine). 

As soon as I started the job, I began to wonder what I was worried about. Everyone seemed to be just more self-assured and confident than I was and I knew that was something that would come with time. And, so it did. I started to come out of my shell more, and in doing that began talking to a certain boy who also worked there. Imagine as a seventeen year old, I could not believe my luck that this 22 year old rather handsome guy wanted to talk to ol’ brace face over here. But hey ho, he did and now fours years on, I can tell you that he is now the one punching (love you bae). 

We began dating, and eventually became boyfriend and girlfriend after a couple of months. Despite not being *technically* old enough to drink, we’d go out for drinks together lol, I met his friends and we’d go for dinner and it was great. It was never difficult, even in the beginning, we just started to fit into each others lives. 

Now I am almost the ripe old age of 22, I have realised that being in a relationship for this long has taught me about patience, compromise and that you don’t always have to follow what society expects of you. Even at my age now, but especially when I was 17, you’re expected to go out every weekend, get with a bunch of people and light up the group chat the next day after a night out with all of the crazy shit you’ve done. I don’t particularly feel as though I have missed out on a part of my life because I’m in a relationship. I trusted my gut and knew that I wanted to spend time with this amazing guy and see where it goes instead of having the predators of Revs in Wilmslow being the only kind of male attention I got. Big no thanks.

I have never really felt as though I was missing out in anything, the beauty of finding a good person to be with is that they make everything you do still as fun if not more because you’ve got them there with you. Whether that is going on holiday together, getting a place together or even dare I say it ~a joint bank account~.

Society has a strange view of millennials right now, as I do not deny that there are those out there sleeping with whoever they want, having no intention of getting into a relationship and I think each to their own – you do you boo. But there are some of us, that are in pretty sweet I’d even call ‘long term relationships’. Not meaning that we immediately are thinking about grown up things, but rather having someone nice to come home to while still simultaneously living the life of a twenty odd year old the way we want to.

With the rise of Tinder, it is becoming harder for young people to find relationships and that is also something else I am very thankful for, security. Having a partner does not define you, but nonetheless I do like that knowing that when I come home they’ll be the someone rather wonderful there waiting for me. Whether that makes me old-fashioned I don’t know, but hey ho you gotta do whatever makes you happy.

Let’s have a banging weekend yeah. 

Nicole x

 

 

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